2018 part 3: And then came the flood…

Posted on by jactucke

*This is part three of my 2018 series. If you haven’t read parts one and two, I have linked them for your enjoyment. Go read those, then come on back to this one…it’ll still be here for you.*

Man, it’s great to see you again! I’m glad you made it back for another round. This one might not be as rough as the first two in this series, but it was just another obstacle in the series of hurdles that was 2018.

So, you last left me at the end of our miscarriage/wife’s hemorrhage. I dropped the hint in there that we decided to sell our house in the middle of the slash up there. Well, as they were shoving the sign in front and we’re walking the eventual buyers in, we were rushing to the hospital.

But good news! Those folks bought our place and we got the long paperwork started on another place. Everyone was just like, “Praise the Lord! Y’all need some sort of good news in the middle of all this mess!” Yeah…we really did.

We had to rent the old house from the new buyers for a month while we closed on our new one. Not a big deal at all. The new house was worth the wait. It was nearly double the square footage of our last and we had the room that we needed to grow as a family.

Signing day came and we couldn’t be more excited. We did our thing at the title company and the place was ours. There were a few errands to run before we got to walk into our new place, so our excitement got put on hold.

Well, a hour at the mechanic turned into three. We were stranded in the Hub and couldn’t get to our new place. So, we sent a friend over to the new place to be our body in the house for the city to turn on the water. No biggie. Except, the next call was the biggie.

Our friend called us and she had bad news. She said there was water in our living room. Not just a little bit either. Standing water in the living room, entry hall, guest room, kids room, front bathroom, and the kitchen. It was just freaking everywhere. So much of it was just ruined. The vinyl plank and hardwood was wrecked. This was literally the afternoon of the first day in the new house. Talk about major face palm.

Somewhere in all the hustle and bustle of getting the house situated, a hot water heater had been shifted and a rubber hose cracked. Somehow, the water was turned on before the city did, it wasn’t turned off and the leaky hose went undetected because no one was there to hear it. Hence, the ensuing flood.

To make a long story short, it took roughly a month or so to get things situated in the new place. Between insurance talks, the flood remediation, the demolition of the old flooring, and the installation of the new…I just wanted to throw my hands up and give it all up. But God…

That guy…He just amazes me. He meets you exactly where you are and puts people in your path who are going to lift you up and support you throughout whatever mess the devil tries to throw on you. I thank Him everyday for those folks who came right up beside us to help share the load.

Proverbs 17:17 says, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” Those friends, those people who are put into your life are indispensable. God gives us those people to sharpen us (Proverbs 27:17), to strengthen us (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12), and to build each other up (1 Thess. 5:11).

Just when you think you’ve been backed into a corner and you have no fight left in you, He sends someone to help hold your arms up like Hur and Aaron did for Moses, Exodus 17:12-14. The Israelites were losing the battle when Moses dropped his arms, but when they were up, they were straight gettin it! So, Moses’ friends, Aaron and Hur, came along side him to hold his arms up with him.

That’s how important having folks beside you is. God made it so that we don’t have to go it alone. That’s why it’s important to get plugged into a church, to get you connected with like-minded people who will be right there doing “life” with you.

This installment was pretty light compared to the previous ones, but the weight of the three instances together was just rough. It was enough to make anyone wanna just crawl up in a hole.

However, as the late, great Billy Mayes said, “But wait, there’s more!” If you have been keeping up with the months, we’re only in June at this point. More heartache was on it’s way. And you’ll hear about it next week. Y’all stay safe out there folks.

2018-part 2 The Bottom Drops Out

Posted on by jactucke

*This is Part two of a possible four part series on “2018.” If you haven’t read the first one yet, here is the link. Go back, read it, then come back for this one.*

Well, well, well. You’re back! I promise this second one will be just about as gut wrenching as the first one. But the biggest takeaway is that God reached out to us through the darkness and comforted us. That’s the only way I can keep saying confidently that everything is and will be just fine. Now, on to the next week.

Just before dad passed, probably the month prior, we found out that we were going to have another kiddo! Oh happy day! It takes an act of Congress for us to get pregnant and we did it all on our own this time! It was so stinking amazing! In the middle of the stuff going on with the Wildman, we had a flicker of light and joy.

The day after dad’s funeral, we went for our first sonogram in Lubbock. We got into the office and sat in the waiting room with nervous excitement. We had joy in this rough time.

Our tech called us back. She squirted the goop stuff and got to work. We had shared some baby experiences with this tech before, actually with both of our prior pregnancies. The mood went from light to a little more subdued and finally somber. She asked where we were in our pregnancy. Jeg told her and she nodded her head.

Honestly, her voice turned into Charlie Brown’s teacher then for me. Jeg can explain this part better than me. I immediately knew something wasn’t right. We had to sit on this vague visit for a week before we got any kind of answers. It had to be one of the most agonizing weeks that either one of us had to date (mind you, my dad had literally died the week before.)

Our doctor told us that our baby stopped growing in the weeks before the sonogram. We had miscarried our new kiddo. That information flooded my mind and buried me under the surf. I wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out. And that was just me. It doesn’t even come close to what Jeg was feeling.

They told us that Jeg would pass the baby naturally. So we got to play the waiting game all over again. I dealt with it by not really dealing with it. I’d talk with my buddies Scott and Tanner and try to explain my feelings, but it was just tough. Yeah, Jeg and I talked about what was going on too, but we didn’t get very deep. How could we? We were walking on the edge of this knife waiting for the final slice.

We decided that some kind of change was needed. We had to snap this stupid funk that the devil was trying to put on us. So we did what anyone who was completely overwhelmed with life and put our house up for sale. 😳

The day our house was being shown to the eventual buyer, something happened. It was roughly a month-ish after the sonogram and Jeg started bleeding. Not, “Oh no…I’m bleeding” but “Holy crap, you’re bleeding…like a lot.” And guess where I was? Two and a half hours away on a pipe recovery job.

When I got that call, my mind flashed back to a month prior when dad died. It was just fear that washed over me instead of peace. I might have kept it cool on the outside, but I was 100 percent afraid that I was gonna lose my best friend.

I thank God every day for the folks I was working with that day. My engineer and company man caught wind of what was going on and they shut down the job and we took off to Levelland. Both of them had been exactly where I was right then and they knew how important it was for me to be there at Jeg’s side.

Another big blessing was that NanaMary, Jeg’s stepmom, was with her until I got there from Odessa. She got her to the ER in Lubbock and threw her weight around to get her admitted. (Not exactly sure how that went, but I just know Mary was all momma bear status and it was awesome.) The attending doctor (who was a former OB/GYN) examined Jeg and said that she was hemorrhaging and part of what was supposed to be passed was still attached and causing the massive bleeding. If she hadn’t gotten there when she did and gotten help, she would have bled out. That was all before I even got there.

When I arrived, all the major excitement was over. We were just left with the weird emotional hangover that I guess comes with narrowly avoiding death. We were discharged and we went home. Just like that, it was all over.

Well, it wasn’t over. It was all just the beginning of us picking up the pieces of our life all over again and handing them to God to do something with. Patch us back together, throw us back together, just do something. We needed something. Some kind of answer to all the pain that we were walking through.

We’re pretty private people. We spent many years in the spotlight and under a microscope through ministry work. This wasn’t a story that we wanted to tell people every other week and it sure wasn’t a story to be told through a game of telephone. The help and support might have been there, but it sure didn’t feel like it. We were treated like we had the plague from most folks. It was just a level of loneliness that we had never experienced before

People who have gone through losing a baby will understand what I’m saying here. Nobody really knows what they need to say or even what they can say. I can say confidently on my end of things, that I was lost and just flat out sad. I didn’t know what to say to my wife, who was absolutely wrecked. What do we do?

Well, we got up and went to church. We sought after God. We figured out what He said about our situation and tried our hardest to apply it.

Second Samuel 12:16-24 talks about David losing his son. Now, this is due to him jacking around with Bathsheba, but his kid gets sick and he goes into mourning and the child dies. After the boy’s death, in verses 23 and 24 he explains what he’s doing.

“But why should I fast when he is dead? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him one day, but he cannot return to me.” Then David comforted Bathsheba, his wife…”

We can’t turn back time and change what happened. All we can do is have our time of mourning and grief. Then, trust that God has got our kiddo there with Him and know that we will go to see them one day. That’s it.

Like I said in the last post, over time things heal and change, but nothing ever goes back to the way it was. Just like in the loss of my dad, this loss left a hole. A little, baby shaped hole. When you really think about it and focus on it, a whole life is supposed to be in that hole. But you have to realize that the only thing you can fill that hole with is the peace and comfort that only the Holy Ghost can bring you. In John 14:16 it says, “And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper (Comforter, Advocate, Intercessor—Counselor, Strengthener, Standby), to be with you forever—” That’s the skinny of it. The only way y’all make it through.

I realize that there is still a ton of unpacking to do in the situation, but that is the barebones of it. Trust that God is still going to have your back. Trust that He is faithful and He is able to do exceedingly and abundantly more than we can even ask or think. Trust that He is going to lead you and your family out of this valley and back to the mountaintop in His glory.

Phew! That was heavy. It’s so tough writing about this because you wind up revisiting and rehashing it all over again. But this is gonna bless someone. To know that someone went through it and made it out is going to encourage somebody out there.

Thanks for reading folks. Stay tuned for part three of “2018” because the hits just just kept coming that year. Y’all stay safe out there.

2018 – The End Was the Beginning

Posted on by jactucke

Man, it’s been a while! Life has been busy since the last time we talked. The oilfield has done it’s thing. The pandemic has done it’s thing. And politics have done their thing! Ha!

I wanted to talk to y’all today about a year that was a turning point for me and my family. It’s gonna be pretty heavy, but know this: God won. Because He always does. It got extremely dark for a while, but God was always there.

Let’s start in the beginning. A little bit prior to February of 2018, my dad, the Wildman, was diagnosed with two types of non-Hodgkins lymphoma: Large B Cell and Follicular. Now, one of these was curable and the other could be controlled and maintained. He had gotten to “ring the bell” and the everything went into remission the Summer of 2017, but the dragon came back with a vengeance in the Fall.

He was tired of fighting. He and my mom had to live in Houston close to MD Anderson so they didn’t wear themselves out driving the seven to eight-ish hour trip weekly. Time and poisonous radiation had taken their toll on the Wildman and when he was told that it was back, he tapped out. He was ready to be in his own home and finish the fight there.

The last time I saw my dad alive was a couple weeks before he passed. I was coming back from a job in Woodward, Oklahoma and was able to stop and spend a couple days with him and NanaRita. Wildman was a shell of his former self. My once jovial dad had been reduced to skin and bones. He couldn’t really move a whole lot without help. He had already begun to not eat as much and drinking was a chore as well.

My plan was to spend a day and then head back for work. But when I went to hug goodbye, he wouldn’t let me go. We cried together for a while. He was scared and so was I. I got to the end of the road and turned right back around. I just couldn’t leave.

We sat and watched his favorite cooking shows, just soaking up one another’s presence. I hurts my heart just thinking about it, but I still have the joy of that time, if that makes any sense. I left early that next morning to start off my work week again. I went not fully realizing but half-knowing that I wouldn’t get much more time with him.

A mere two weeks later, I get a call from my oldest brother, James. I was on day 14 of a stuck drilling rig that had just been a tough sucker. He tells me I’m gonna need to get some relief because Dad wasn’t going to last much longer. As the ladies on Crime Junkie say, I had full body chills all the way back to Levelland. James calls and says I can hold off until the next day to come. So I get to spend a few hours with Jeg and the girls before I head their way the next day, Valentines Day.

You know, you always folks talking about those “never forget” moments. The moments where you know exactly what you were doing when a certain event happened. Valentines Day 2018 was one of those moments for me. I had gotten on the road early to make the two and a half hour drive the next morning. I got to Lorenzo, about 40 minutes into my drive, and I got the call. I had stopped in to grab a quick bite at the local Allsups. When I hung up the phone, my stomach was rolling around my feet like a quarter. The Wildman was gone.

The ensuing days were a blur. Comforting my mom, my brothers, and my family was my primary function of course. It’s just hard to describe the feeling of that kind of loss. Those who have been through it completely understand and those who haven’t have been spared.

So many people told me how awesome my dad was. I heard, “They don’t make anyone like that anymore.” “Your dad was definitely one of a kind.” “He was the best man that I ever knew.” “Nobody ever had anything bad to say about your dad.” It was just surreal hearing folks refer to him in the the past tense.

You find out who really cares about you when you’re in these dark places. We had numerous friends make the trip to love on us. (Thank you for that by the way.) Phone calls and food were in abundance. It was just amazing. Then, on the following Sunday, we laid him to rest and the challenge of grieving began.

I’ll use a whole other blog to write about the grieving process because it’s just too complicated to include here. It just came wave upon wave. I’m thankful for my wife, who just loved on me and my mom the best way she knew how. And my sweet kiddos. Goodness, those girls are incredible.

I was back to reality by Tuesday and it just sucked. I had a peace that he was in Heaven with Jesus but it didn’t help that he wasn’t here. That being said, you never really get over that loss. You just lean into that peace and comfort that the Holy Ghost gives you. (More on this later.)

A verse that I really took in during this time was Psalm 34:18 – The Lord is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. The cool thing about God, is that He hangs out right there with you. Right there in your hurt. You may be a slobbering mess, but the HG…He’s got you.

Time heals all wounds, they say. Who is they? I’m not exactly sure, but that next week…the wound from my dad’s death was about to ripped open and exposed all over again in the form of another set of tragedies.

But that’s gonna be next week in part two of “2018.” Feel free to leave a comment of encouragement or even a snippet of your own story. Y’all stay safe out there.

He’s working…

Posted on by jactucke

Has there ever been a time where you just don’t think anyone is listening? I know my wife feels like this often with our kiddos(and sometimes me, but we aren’t gonna go there, haha!)

“Pick up these toys, please.” “Put up your shoes, please.” “Can you let the dogs in, please?” “Who’s shoes are these and why are they still out?” On and on it goes.

It’s a daily drone of wash, rinse, repeat with our words. When this cycle continues like it does, it makes it feel like your words fall to the floor as soon as they leave your mouth. It is exhausting.

Isn’t it the same feeling when we talk to God? We ask for help, healing, financial breakthrough, etc., and when we don’t get an answer in our own timeframe, we throw our hands up. He’s working.

We shout and shake our fists at the sky and say, “You said that you’d be there!” He’s working.

Just because WE say jump, we expect God to respond with, “How high?” He’s working.

Don’t think that I’m just putting this out there as a generality. I’ve been there, man. We’ve thrown away pregnancy test after pregnancy test that was negative. He’s working. Sat in the sonogram room when a typically chatty nurse clammed up and wouldn’t tell us what we were looking at on the screen. He’s working. I’ve looked at a budget that was in the red month after month and had no clue how things would get covered. He’s working.

We have been right there with you. I remember, vividly, every single time I prayed in these situations. I would ask God, “What the heck man?”

I heard a song the other day and it solidified what I had been taught through the years. It’s called “Way Maker” by Sinach, but the version that I like most is done by Leeland. Links to both will be included.

It starts off saying “You are here, moving in our midst…working in this place, I worship you.” If that’s not great enough, it gets better. The song moves into what He is for us:

Way maker

Miracle worker

Promise keeper

Light in the darkness

My God

That is who you are

The bridge is my favorite part of the entire song. “Even when I don’t see it you’re working. Even when I don’t feel it, you’re working. You never stop, never stop working.”

Jesus never stops working for us. In Hebrews 7:25 it says, “Therefore he is able, once and forever, to save those who come to God through him. He lives forever to intercede with God on their behalf.” That simply means that Jesus is ALWAYS working for us. And as He intercedes for us, we have the Holy Spirit as a comforter to help guide us through this hard time.

Proverbs 3:5 says that we have to “trust in the Lord with ALL of our heart, and lean not on our own understanding.” To turn into yourself will always lead you down a rough path. You’ll search for comfort in the wrong things and turn yourself from God.

He is above everything that you face. He’s greater than any diagnosis or any negative word that is spoken over you. He is sitting right now, lobbying on your behalf.

So trust that even though it seems like nothing is happening…He’s working. And He never stops working.

Y’all stay safe out there.

Wave upon wave

Posted on by jactucke

Grief and loss can be…well, weird. It stops you dead in your tracks. It disrupts everything. And your norm? Forget about it.

Over the last year, our family has had a TON of loss. It started back in February of 2018 when my dad passed away from a long battle with lymphoma. That was a huge blow. Then, the following week, we had a miscarriage and a hemorrhage where I almost lost my wife. That was one of the scariest things I’ve ever experienced.

Six months later in August, my Grannie passed away. Days later, our Aunt Nona passed. Six months after that, my wife’s Mimi passed away unexpectedly. Talk about when it rains, it pours!

Loss upon loss upon loss upon loss. It was pretty tough for a good stretch of life. Explaining death and loss to a four and two-year-old is not fun, let me tell you.

It felt as if loss and grief had come and set up shop in our house.

What could we do? I went to work. Jeg kept busy. We just kept our minds focused on the task at hand: living life. We talked about everything. We prayed together. We prayed over our littles.

We’ve always been taught that there are seasons in your life. That there will be times when things are really good and times where things will just plain suck. Check out Ecclesiastes 3:

“There’s an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth: A right time for birth and another for death, A right time to plant and another to reap, A right time to kill and another to heal, A right time to destroy and another to construct, A right time to cry and another to laugh, A right time to lament and another to cheer, A right time to make love and another to abstain, A right time to embrace and another to part, A right time to search and another to count your losses, A right time to hold on and another to let go, A right time to rip out and another to mend, A right time to shut up and another to speak up, A right time to love and another to hate, A right time to wage war and another to make peace.” Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 MSG

To me, this season did more than just suck. It was flat out terrible. Grief just came in waves. Right when you were able to get your head above the first wave, a bigger one rolled in to push you back under. Wave upon wave just pushed us further from where we wanted to be, which was on the shore with peace.

I know, the Word says that there are seasons. I said it and referenced it just right up there. But that doesn’t make it any easier in the moment. “Well, why didn’t you talk to someone?” We did and it helped…for a time. But when you’re in a season of grief, and this is solely my opinion, other people have no idea what you’re feeling. Sure they could have experienced the same loss, but the same feelings? Nah bruh. I quit writing. Nothing felt the same, no matter how many folks I sought counsel from.

The biggest thing that has helped our family has been Jesus and leaning on the fact that every one of these family members had a relationship with Him. It’s like in 2 Samuel, when David lost his son. He prayed and fasted and slept on the floor waiting for God to move. When he learned that he had passed, David got up, cleaned himself up, and ate. Most importantly, he worshipped God. It’s his actions that have really pushed me during our season of grief.

His servants were astounded by his actions. They wondered why he did what he did. Why did he worship after he passed? He said:

“…why should I fast when he is dead? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him one day, but he cannot return to me.” Then David comforted Bathsheba, his wife…” 2 Samuel 12:23-24 NLT

He knew that he’d see him again, so he cleaned up and comforted his wife. And out of his season of grief, Solomon was born. The one who’d build the Temple. Literally, the wisest man was born out of grief and loss. How cool is that?

Things are better. Will they ever be the same? No. Not at all. But things don’t need to be the same. We have to grow, be stretched, and experience these things.

Psalms 30:5 says that, “weeping may last through the night, but joy comes in the morning.” And later, it goes on to say, “You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy, that I might sing praises to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever!” (Psalms 30:11-12 NLT)

During your season of grief, take comfort in Jesus. That’s literally the only thing that can shine a little light in your valley. He loves you and will never leave you. Remember, there’s joy in the morning.

Have a great day folks! Leave a comment or two just to let me know y’all are still hanging out. Y’all stay safe out there.

Drifting Away

Posted on by jactucke


The other day whilst parousing the depths of the Internet, I glanced at an article that I thought was click bait. You know, one of those sites that has the super attractive headline, only to have you wade through an endless stream of ads for testosterone booster and that one fruit that is a miracle cure. 

Anyways, I moved on without clicking. But yesterday, my wife sends it to me. This time, it was from the Independent Journal Review. The headline read, “Christian Pastor Rob Bell Suggests Ignoring the Bible to Help the Church Stay Relevant.”

Excuse me? As I read further, Mr. Bell and his wife were on Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday special talking about homosexuality and the church. When asked if the church closer to accepting homosexuality, he replied:

“I think culture is already there and the church will continue to be even more irrelevant when it quotes letters from 2,000 years ago as their best defense…”

Let’s stop right there. To even think that a pastor…of a church…who pours into thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of people…suggested to ignore the Word in order to “accept” people in their sin. 
But this isn’t the first time Mr. Bell has raised eyebrows. In his book, Love Wins, he dismisses the idea of Hell to make Christianity a little more attractive to new believers. But let’s get back to where our journey started. 

Bell implies that the Word is becoming too old to be relevant in our changing world. I guess that since it doesn’t mention smartphones and the Internet, people nowadays won’t be able to relate. 

Homosexuality seems to be a touchy subject within the church. Bell suggests changing or moving beyond the Word to meet people where they are, even if it means accepting their sin. My issue isn’t with his stance on homosexuality, it’s with his dismissal of the Word with such ease. 

The Word warns us about adding or taking away from the text. In Proverbs 30:6, it says, “Do not add to his words, or he may rebuke you and expose you as a liar.” In 2 Peter 1:20-21, it says “For no prophecy was ever produced by the will of man, but men spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit.” And numerous others from Revelation and Deuteronomy talk about not adding or subtracting. 

You can even argue that Mr. Bell is merely saying to ignore the scripture’s stance on homosexuality, not the entire Bible. Well, that’s like taking an Exacto knife and cutting out the pieces that you don’t like, effectively making it your own personal version of the Bible. But there’s a scripture for that as well. 

Take 2 Timothy 3:16-17. It says, “All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work.” That being said, EVERYTHING in the Word is useful. EVERYTHING is meant to teach and instruct us how to live. That doesn’t say “take this out when society changes.” 

Society is gonna change. Cultural norms are gonna change. But as Christians, we are given a book that defines our right and wrong. It literally lays out the framework for a great life. There most beautiful thing about it? It doesn’t change. 

“The grass withers and the flowers fade, but the word of our God stands forever.””

‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭40:8‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Mr. Bell, I can see where you are going with your view, but I can confidently say that you’re off base. The thing that stinks about this is that you were given a platform and you told everyone to just ignore what you have been teaching out of for decades. 

What I would like to encourage you to do is get in your Word. Start off in John and explore the story of Jesus. Find out what He’s done for you through His sacrifice on the cross. It’s through that sacrifice that you can receive salvation and begin to walk with God as it was intended from the very beginning. 

Thanks for the read. Please feel free to comment below and do me a favor, like and share this with your friends. Y’all be safe out there. 

Badge of Busyness

Posted on by jactucke


Just the other night, I called my brother-in-law from California to talk over a few things. We chatted a little bit, you know…nothing earth shattering. It was all just small talk really. But then we got on the subject of busyness and he said something that I had heard a long time ago, but never really gave a thought to it. 

We talked about how busyness is a major yoke in people’s lives today. People always judge either how productive or how crappy their day was by their busyness. He said, “People wear it like a badge of honor, but it really is a yoke of burden.”

BOOM! That was a truth bomb right there. Our badge is also our yoke that holds us in bondage. You see, we are taught our entire lives that we need to keep busy. Our productivity is measured by how busy our days are. The busier, the better.

We really can’t formally measure busyness with a figure, but we can measure it by how we work and the way our duties are accomplished. You can have two people with the same amount of responsibilities. One may be able to get the list done in nine hours and say that they had the busiest day of their life. Whereas, the other person could knock out the same list in the same time and have a completely different outlook. It’s all in your perspective. 

Like I said earlier, we been trained that our productivity is measured by our busyness and that’s a problem. People aren’t wired the same. Everyone works at different paces, learns at different speeds and no “busyness” can be compared to another. But everyone wants to blame their shortcomings on being busy. 

I’ve done it. I can come home all tired and my oldest will ask, “You have busy days daddy?” She’s not even three yet and she knows about that badge that we wear like a sign. 

So what does the Word say about busyness. Jesus slammed it pretty hard with Mary and Martha. Go check it out in Luke 10:38-42. Martha was running around like a crazy woman, trying to prepare the meal for Jesus and the disciples and her sister was just chilling at the feet of Christ. Naturally, Martha was a little ticked. She even commented to Jesus about it. His response put her in her place:

“Martha, dear Martha, you’re fussing far too much and getting yourself worked up over nothing. One thing only is essential, and Mary has chosen it—it’s the main course, and won’t be taken from her.”

‭‭Luke‬ ‭10:41-42‬ ‭MSG‬‬

Martha was so busy, she missed out on the important thing: Jesus’ teaching in her own home! 

You see, you can become so preoccupied with life, so busy, that you miss out on important things: time with God, time with family or even a blessing. 

Now, I’m not saying that you should be all chilled out and not getting any work done. But you don’t need to be too busy that you neglect what’s important. 

Ecclesiastes 3 says there’s a time and a season for everything. It goes on with this: “Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end. So I concluded there is nothing better than to be happy and enjoy ourselves as long as we can. And people should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of their labor, for these are gifts from God.” (‭‭Ecclesiastes‬ ‭3:11-13‬ ‭NLT‬‬)

God has a plan and a purpose for your life and it’s not to stay so busy that you miss His purpose for you. It’s all planned out by Him, we just need to stay in tune with what He says that we should do. 

How do we do that? How do we even begin to understand the plan that He has for our lives? Get in your Word. Get in a church that will teach you the uncomprimised Word of God. Surround yourself with people of like faith. Slow your life down. Don’t just quit working, but slow down enough to not let your plans overtake His plans. 

Take off that badge of busyness. Quit wearing it like a yoke around your neck. Quit letting it dictate your steps. Matthew 11:28 says “Come unto me all who are heavy burdened and I will give you rest.” Get some encouragement from my friend Coffey. Here’s his song “All Ye,” you’ll be blessed. 

Thanks for your time today. Y’all be safe out there. 

I’m sorry…ish

Posted on by jactucke


When a child gets caught doing something they aren’t supposed to do they immediately say, “I’m sorry.” They either feel a little remorse or they just don’t want to get in deeper trouble. 

Most of the time, they don’t want to get in more trouble than they already are in. This is the most basic of human instincts: self-preservation. 

Self-preservation will make people do all kinds of things. It will make them apologize for nothing or just to smooth over an altercation. It’ll make them say sorry just because “it’s the right thing to do.”

What does all of this have to do with our topic today? Well, all that being said, “I’m sorry” does not mean “forgive me.” 

Lots of times, the two phrases get tangled or misconstrued. We are raised to believe that they are one-in-the-same, interchangeable if you will. But they aren’t. Actually, they can’t be further from it. 

We’ve already established that self-preservation is a pretty basic human instinct, but, just for grins and giggles, let’s take a look at the definition. 

If any of you have lied at any time in your life, you know that this definition is true, especially when you saw your life flash before your eyes as the paddle swings towards your hindquarters. You knew it wouldn’t be as bad if you apologized or if you drug as many siblings down with you as possible. I digress.

Now on to forgiveness.Webster’s defines forgiveness as:


Now that’s a pretty good definition, but it’s a pretty good indicator why “I’m sorry” and “forgive me” are lumped together in the indistinguishable column. This is where we are going to start to separate the two. 

True forgiveness comes when one has a repentant heart. Meaning that they are truely remorseful for their actions. It’s not a knee jerk reaction to being caught, but a sincere, from the heart decision. Where does this logic come from? The Word of course!

In 2 Corinthians 7:10 it says, “For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death.” Godly repentance will actually change things. A true repentant heart is necessary for one to achieve salvation through Christ. 

Well how do we know if we are truely repentant instead of just remorseful? Judas was remorseful for his betrayal of Jesus (Matt. 27:4.) Pharoah told Moses that he had sinned, but he just kept going forward with his actions (Ex. 9:27; 10:16.) But in Proverbs 28:13 it says that, “Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.” That right there tells us that true forgiveness will follow true repentance. You can’t only drop a half truth on someone and expect that to be honored. 

We all have an obligation to seek forgiveness and to give forgiveness (Matt. 18:15) when we have wronged or have been wronged. But I believe, as in the same vein as salvation, to receive complete forgiveness, you have to come with an actual repentant heart. God will always forgive you and show grace (1 John 1:9) but you need to show a repentant heart, not just remorse for your actions. 

If in the end, you’ve done all of this. You’ve gone to God with a repentant heart and gone to those you have wronged with a repentant heart, the weight is now off of you and in their court. We’ve established that God will forgive you and cleanse you. People, on the other hand, will have a harder time with this. If they do what they have been instructed by God to do, you will be forgiven. But this doesn’t mean that things will just go back to normal. People are still…people. Trust has to be earned back and it may never go back to the olden days, but you can take heart that you have been forgiven. 

This may be a little heavy, but I know that there is a large group of people out there who need a little uplifting and guidance on this issue. Thanks for reading, y’all be safe out there. 

When seeking advice…

Posted on by jactucke


Have you ever asked for advice? I’m sure you have because even the meekest of decisions can usually require a little guidance.  

You most likely sought that counsel from someone you trusted, someone who had been in the position before, or at least a person who has a few years on you. 

The Word even talks about getting advice. Proverbs is chalk full of what God thinks about getting advice. Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future (Proverbs 19:20). Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed (Proverbs 15:22). Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety (Proverbs 11:14). And the verses just keep going. 

All that being said, there are two types of people who take this mantle: askers and seekers. Now, I know that both of these seem like these names are just describing the same thing, but listen to these descriptions. 
People identifying as “askers” are truly looking for advice. By that, I mean they are seeking Godly counsel, from Godly people. They don’t just talk to folks willy-nilly. Askers don’t have any ulterior motives or notions propelling them to any side. They are simply looking for guidance.

“Seekers” have a preconceived notion of what they want in their head and will go to numerous people (Goldy and otherwise) to seek out someone who thinks the same as themselves. Proverbs 28:26 says Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered.

You see the problem in that? There is no wisdom there. You are only fooling yourself if you think that your “newfound advice” is even new at all. It’s just your own opinion wrapped in the guise of a few other people’s words.  

I have run into both types of these people in all my travels and let me tell ya, beware the seekers. They have become people who drain you of time and energy with zero intention of utilizing your counsel. 

Now, am I saying that you shouldn’t seek advice from anyone? No, that’s not it at all. I’m just saying that you should seek Godly counsel when you are looking for advice and not running from person to person looking for your own answer. 

Psalm 1:1-6 says this: Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers. The wicked are not so, but are like chaff that the wind drives away. Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous; 

So seek Godly counsel and don’t becomes merely a seeker of your own ideas in other people. 

It feels good to be back. I took a little time off to focus on some other things, but now I’m back. If you have any other comments or additions, please leave them below. Have a great day!

The One Who Whispers

Posted on by jactucke

“I heard that she…”

“They said that he…”

“No, you must not have heard…”

It’s all about the he-said, she-said nowadays. If you aren’t saying something about someone else’s business, you are lagging behind by today’s standards. 

Most of the time, people see this as a sort of power and control. Kind of like a spider with an ever widening web of information. Now this information can be false or true, but the common denominator is that it will always benefit the spider. 

Sadly, I have seen this most prevalent within the Church. Dissention and discord are tools that the devil loves to plant within the Church and divide its members. So many lives and relationships have been wrecked and splintered due to people who can’t keep their mouths shut. 

A dishonest man spreads strife, a whisperer separates close friends. 

Proverbs 16:28

We were sitting at lunch following church one day and the table next to us was full of some guys who had just left their church service. They complained and gossiped about their church leadership and things that generally disgruntled them about their church. One couldn’t help but overhear the numerous, “Did you hear?” and “He told me that she said that…” Which leads me into the next point.

The worst of this is that the people who do the talking, don’t even realize that they are actually hurting their witness and damaging their credibility. The Word talks about in Titus 3 that we need to be “submissive to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good work, to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people. For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another.” 

At one time, we did talked mess left and right and blended right in with the world. But to be a Christian means that you are separated from the world. If you are constantly whispering about your leaders and other Christians, you are just as bad. 

Going back to Titus, in 2:7-8 it is written that we have to show ourselves as a “model of good works.” You are to “show integrity and dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned.”

Remember that your words are powerful and to guard yourself. If it helps, pray this verse from Psalms everyday. 

Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips. 

Psalm 141:3

Thanks for reading. Y’all be safe out there.